Inner Self

I am happy !!

divinemortal — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 18:52:18 +0000

The moment I landed at Bangalore airport, many changes in my lifestyle, standards, routine, thoughts, perceptions and expectations, surprised me. This city is like a stage to me, where I, as an actor, am left alone, without a script, free to play any character I want to and recollect & write a script after the performance. I am playing a guy who is enjoys his work, time with friends, play sports and have dinner with his love each day. I always wished for this life and hence I am living a happy life. These positive changes are forcing me to think whether this play is momentary or is it my chance to live a happy life (like ‘lived happily ever after’)? I mean, should I be happy about this change or worry about its momentary nature ( the only constant thing in life is ‘change’, as they say)

Though I do not keep any of my earlier posts in mind while writing a new one, I exceptionally gave a look to my posts and realized that some of them are focusing on good, satisfying, happy life. I remember a friend used to say that one should not be too happy about the present because life is a balance, so if you had your share of happiness today then you will probably get your share of sadness tomorrow, hence not being too happy about the present can save little suffering of future. But if I look back, I can see my hard work (in life) going in vain, and everything looked so dark and scary that after-all-it’s-written caught hold of my thoughts. I still remember how, every morning, I forced myself to kick-start my bike and leave home for office, without being able to convince myself that it is worth doing so. I never had anything on charts/to-do list for a day or week for that matter. It was just like a watch man outside a building (with no offence to him) who knows that he has to go to work (because other people need him), sit and be aware of the surroundings, and the time he devotes is not of much help (except the mental pressure a thief might have, that there is someone on guard) till there is some emergency, and this work profile is there for last many years with no extra expectations from him. I was sitting idle, aware of my work and surroundings but never been called/given/expected to do anything different from a normal, forty-year-old procedural work, and when I tried to do anything extra, I got bashed by the clichéd sentence ‘we are doing this for 40 odd years’. With no offence to the people who work there, my point is pretty clear that I was not brought up in this kind of environment and also not been programmed to do any of those things. The irony is I acquired skills and education from government institutions and still could not relate myself to a government company (and I am not talking money here). After giving my morning’s, noon’s and some evening’s time to the no-work-in-office, I never got enthusiasm to do anything else too. I never thought of enjoying myself by joining gym/sports/just hanging out in the city. Going for some drinks (in the same bar I used to go while in college) was the most I can do to keep myself uptight. BUT everything is changing now. I am enjoying my work, having good time at home, at sports etc. and still left with enthusiasm to involve myself in some more activities.

In a nutshell, I already had my share of sadness in the past and hence this is the time to get my share of happiness. After all, there is hue and cry when we are going through bad phase of life, then why can’t we tell people about our life when we are happy (that too when you believe that people’s best wishes play a major role in your success).

Thank you all and seeking your wishes for my future too.

Weekends !!!

divinemortal — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 19:16:29 +0000

We all (atleast guys) want to live our ‘after college bachelor life’ like Joey and Chandler as flatmate did. I am sure I need not introduce Joey and Chandler to you (atleast to the people I grew up with). I still remember I started watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S in the second year of my college and screwed lot of my assignments because I was enjoying hanging out at coffee shop/Monica’s place. I was not a part of their conversation but I was listening to all of them very closely. I still remember the Foosball table, Video games, Porn movies, Lazy chairs, Chick & Duck, Wooden dog, King size refrigerator etc. at Joey and Chandler’s place. I always wanted to have a similar flat with all the facilities (except Chick & Duck and wooden dog, may be). We ( me and my flatmate) are on a spree to buy those stuff. He (flatmate) has managed to get Playstation and Fooseball table . I am looking for lazy chairs in Bangalore, but I guess Bangalore people are not lazy enough to show interest in the chair and hence no company has yet launched them here. Anyways, the weekends are no more boring; play badminton, swim in the pool, play fooseball with beer cans, listen to music, go to guitar class, watch movies on PVR, stay at Bangalore is becoming the favorite phase of my life. The life seems so perfect when I enjoy all this and also stay close to my better half always. Hope life has many more pleasant surprises for me in the kitty, after all nothing is enough.

Make a promise and keep it

divinemortal — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 20:43:24 +0000

Random thoughts wandered, when one of my friends did not keep her promise

It is a social obligations to fulfill promises we make and promise is a voluntary moral obligation.So, in effect there is a social obligation to fulfill a voluntary obligation. But, only social obligation of keeping promises suffice or guarantees the compliance? Answer to this question might give us an answer to the next question, Should one trust other person?

Promisee puts him/herself at risk by trusting promiser. In a situation where promiser does not feel like keeping the promise because of some selfish reason (or under the first law of nature ‘self defense’ ) the idea of trusting the promiser goes in vain. So the risk to the promisee is, how well the promiser is willing to abide by the social obligation of keeping the promises. Hence, any promise made on grounds of trust is not a promise at all, there has to be some other good reason. Promisee might feel that there is no downside after a promise is made by promiser but the risk of compliance is on promisee instead of promiser. Then what is the driving force for a promiser to keep his/her promise? Which again indicate that there has to be selfish reason for the promiser to keep or not to keep a promise. According to his/her will he/she will keep/ not keep the promise. Does that mean there is nothing called trust in this world? Should one not trust other person without any other grounds?

Any comments?

divinemortal — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 19:19:09 +0000

What is the difference between :

1. A girl having a guy’s photo in her purse.

2. A guy having a girl’s photo in his wallet.

Any comments?

Peace of mind

divinemortal — Thu, 14 Jan 2010 20:17:03 +0000

May be because of my passion, support from other people OR after fidgeting and long assiduous tries to learn from websites, I have decided to join guitar classes today. Surprisingly, it has never been so expensive to learn something I am so interested in, but I hope this will pay me off later. The thing that gives me peace of mind is guitar, and I think I figured it out, quite early, for which some people take years and some could never figure out. This is my second extra curricular interest, after dance, which popped up suddenly one day and my fingers got used to the strings no time (like my feet to the floor). There are few other things on the list, I want to engage myself with, while I am in Bangalore. One, I want to be a regular swimmer, and there is a very nice swimming pool in my club house. Two, I want to join horse riding classes, which my flat-mate has suggested. I am not sure whether my interest and enthusiasm will remain for long for all this, but I think I will, at least, take a step forward and try them out.

Shattered

divinemortal — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 20:04:50 +0000

Have you ever heard that no matter how confident you are in life, one comment from other people can dig so deep into heart that, your confidence gets shattered to the bottom. Well, you might argue that if this happens then you were not confident at first. But trust me sometimes it does happen, and then you start questioning your own beliefs, perceptions, perspective, and expectations. So that is the time you need your near and dear ones to give you support and help you out of the ‘shattered to the bottom’ phase. This week is one of the worst week of my life. I got comments that, I am not worth the better half of my life by lot of observers/fans/jealous people/Wannabees whatever you want to call them. Well, I am lucky to have some people in my life, who listen, suggest, laugh, cry, talk, walk, feel, respond, and support me. And I am also lucky that at the end of the day the better half always remember that I am the other one. Well, this post is a thanking note to those ‘some people’.

needs, wants, connect

divinemortal — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 18:40:08 +0000

Well, I was taking a walk today with some random thoughts in my mind, like, you get only what you want and it doesn’t matter what you need. Sometimes, even if you want and you get it, you might ultimately shift to what you are, or, connect yourself with. these thoughts were coming from my life. I shifted from engineering to banking to consults and now marketing. I am not sure whether marketing is what I am fit for but I enjoy selling and making strategies to turn out successful. Selling yourself in interviews, selling answers on answer sheets, selling ideas in competitions, selling college festivals and events to sponsors or selling products in market.I somehow connect myself very well with the process of strategizing the ‘selling’ and thats what i call marketing. My first real life marketing project has started today, lets see how will this turn out.

Ciao Ragazzi e Ragazze

divinemortal — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 20:35:59 +0000

Its been three years of sabbatical from ‘blog’ world. I am sure there have been some changes since then in blogging style, but I, anyways, was not a pro back then and not sure about now too. There might be some changes in my writing style, which even I have to figure out myself. Let’s see what I have this time, and how I will be able to do justice to my blog. Well, 10 major milestones in my life after 21st December 2006 ( my last post) :

1. 12th May 2007: Somehow completed BTP on time (literally).

2. 16th May 2007: Got admission call from IIM A

3. 28th May 2007: Someone special came to my life.

4. 11th August 2007: IIT (Convocation): thrown out with a paper confirming that I am a Chemical Engineer.

5. Sept 2008 – Dec 2008: ‘To see Europe atleast once in lifetime’ is no more a dream. Paris is now my favorite city.

6. 9th March 2009: The word “Indian” got added to my CV, third time ( “Indian Oil Corporation Limited”) after “Indian Institute of Technology” and “Indian Institute of Management”. But this time I was not happy about it.

7. 28th March 2009: IIM A (Convocation): thrown out of the campus, in recession, with a paper confirming that I am an alumnus now.

8. June 2009: Bought a guitar for myself and started learning from net.

9. 23rd Dec 2009: Somehow got rid of the third “Indian” and joined “WNS Marketing Research and Analytics” team

10. 3rd Jan 2010: Decided to blog again

And now lets start and track the journey onwards.

Pally Shelly

divinemortal — Thu, 21 Dec 2006 07:39:48 +0000

You’re a cute friend of ours,
that I want you to know,
being away from you for so long
we are feeling so alone.

I remember, when we laughed together
stomachs were really in pain,
everyone tried to stop us
but their efforts went in vain.

I remember, when we worked together
we danced all night,
everybody loved you so much
like a princess…….right

I remember, we were behind you every time
to make u learn steps fast,
you used to be first in the line
when I was standing last

But then I also remember,
you went away so far,
I can count the talks we had after that
we started feeling under par

I remember, doing choreo without you
we missed you so much
we used to talk about you a lot
you were there in front of us as such

Too often we don’t realize
What we have until it is gone
Too often we wait too late to say
“without you we all are alone”

But now as you are coming back
we will again have our jelly,
and i can get another chance,
to yell in madness….shellyyyyyyy

All in All

divinemortal — Sun, 01 Oct 2006 07:05:56 +0000

All I remember is everything
All she understands is nothing

All we have talked is us
All we have seen are eyes
All we have felt is breath
All we have shared is world

All she gave me is happiness
All I gave her is me
All we have are memories
All we lost is love

All we dreamt, is past
All I suffered is future
All I assumed is emancipated
All we know is emasculated

All I remember is everything
All she understands is nothing